Ticket Releases and The Shapiro Strategy

In News that didn’t shock me a bit, The Dead announced that more tickets will be released for The Fare Thee Well Shows at Soldier Field. If you’ve been following the blog, I’ve been talking about this for months. The announcement came via their website and was probably a poor idea. Why make an announcement 5 days before the onsale??? Just to be sure it circulates enough for every ticket agent out there to catch the news… Why not just release the tickets without saying a thing? All of a sudden, BAM! Tickets are on TicketMaster. Why not make the announcement the minute they’re released giving the people that follow the band and their social media avenues the heads up on the release? Why instead make an announcement 5 days prior to the release, lining up every single broker and person that has tickets already, as well as those that don’t, at the starting line all at once? Am I the only one that thinks this idea leaves a lot to be desired?

I’ll give you the answer now… Peter Shapiro is a genius. Say what you want about him or the event but this has been a masterful job of promoting. The tricks used are not new but apparently unknown by the vast majority of the fan base. The first batch of tickets that were released were all of the less desirable seats that most commonly go unpurchased or at the very least, purchased last. All of the shit seats are already Sold, GENIUS move number 1!!! Not only that, they only sold a percentage of the total seats available which created the illusion of a scarcity of tickets. What would Garcia say? He already said it, “Cats in the limelight, Feels like it’s all right! Everybody wants something they might not get!” Shapiro took that advice to heart. He created the sensation of lack and scarcity that not only drove demand among Dead Heads but drove every segment of the media right into his lap. Look at us!!! We sold out in 10 seconds! Brilliant Marketing! All of a sudden the demand was so inflated that everyone imaginable wanted a piece of the Grateful Dead Pie. Every news organization in the country has run articles on the demand for tickets, Genius move #2!

While tickets on the secondary market swelled up, those dumb enough to buy were spending a fortune purchasing seats with absolutely no view behind the stage. There’s a few things that even Shapiro hates to see. Fans that are extremely disappointed and an out of control secondary market. While the iron was red hot, they struck up 2 shows in California and put nearly every available seat on sale through Internet Mail Order. That was a hit as the internet mail order completely sold out. All along, The Official Home of Unofficial Grateful Dead News was reporting that there are TONS of unreleased tickets. I ran into a few people that thought I was nuts but that’s OK, they’re probably right… So here we are, waiting patiently until Friday as well as hitting TicketMaster every half hour until then(Just in case). Will Friday be the last release? If I had to guess, the next batch of less desirable seats will be put out on TicketMaster with a handful of decent seats. Why do that? Because a lot of people with tickets will absolutely buy tickets again if they have a chance to upgrade their seats from behind the stage to anywhere in front of it. Garcia might say, “Strategy was a strength, not disaster…” Genius MOVE #3!!!

Why tell everybody 5 days in advance of a ticket release? This one is a no brainer too! It ensures the next wave of seats will sell out just as fast as the first. In order to keep interest as high as possible, the sense of extremely limited availability has to be maintained. With a fresh wave of euphoria for those who get their tickets, there will also be a fresh wave of aggravation. The most important thing that will happen is EVERYBODY talking about it. The more chatter, the better. Drives all attention back to the big event. If I had to guess, I’d say a minimum of 30% of the tickets are still available. I don’t think this will be the last release either. I think tickets will continue to be released in the weeks to come right up to day of show! GENIUS Move #4!!!

When all is said and done, everybody willing to pay face for a ticket will get in. For many, they’ve spent months shitting on each and every day of their lives worrying about a problem that was never a problem. The strategy isn’t a new one at all but it was played perfectly. Like a magic trick that’s been around forever, the shit still works. The collapse of the secondary market is already beginning and following the arrival of mail order tickets plus the additional tickets being released, tix will start circulating in big numbers. I can just hear the poor fools in the lots and hotels in Chicago trying to sell their extras by saying, “I didn’t pay face brah, I got these on StubHub and I paid $(insert crazy price that is an inflated lie here).” Nobody will be buying and the Good Seats will start getting released by Shapiro at the same time through more week and day of show releases. It will destroy the greed of people that thought they’d make some money back on them in Chicago. “Oooohh Oooooh ooh ooh my plans didn’t work out like I thought. I made my trap for you but it seems like I got caught.” Peter Shapiro has done a great job playing this one and in the end, all is forgiven because we’re ALL getting in!!!

Then again, maybe I don’t know shit… I’ve also already mentioned, nobody has fewer connections than I do. Keep an eye on it and watch as it unfolds! If you’re registered on this WordPress site, please register at gratefuldean.com as I’m going to be doing all of my writing in one place and that will be the place.  It’s extremely exciting to see everybody receiving their tickets in the mail this week! Amazing that we’re only a month out!!! Can’t wait to see y’all in Chicago! If you don’t have tix, stop worrying about it! There’s PLENTY!!! Love You Long Time!!!

Dead To The Core,
Dean Sottile (pronounced So Tilly)

FB Group at The Official Home of Unofficial Grateful Dead News

Throwback Thursday: Space->Watchtower->China Doll…

We’re somewhere during Space… Garcia is playing around with his midi and it sounds like a dolphin looking for a piece of ass… I’m right on the outskirts of having complete control of my thoughts… If only this Space would end… Phil keeps making the face that Phil makes… You know the one… Like he’s saying “I don’t know what’s gonna happen… I don’t know… Maybe I know… Nope… I don’t know…” Terrapin preceded Drums so this should be a Weir tune… From deep inside The Space confusion I can hear Weir hinting at the Watchtower… The Space finds a completely silent moment… It’s so quiet amongst so many people, I feel as though I’m almost afraid to say anything… I really want to scream WATCHTOWER!!!!!!! Letting everyone know that I know… I don’t because I figure that would make me an asshole… It’s OK to know all by yourself… A guy near me breaks the silence by screaming “BROKEN DOWN PALACE”… What the fuck is he thinking??? Weir’s riffs signal the hurricane of Sound that is The Watchtower… The place comes alive in an instant!!! Phil still has the “I don’t know what’s coming” face on… The jams are as hard rockin as they could be!!! Every time it seems like the jam might break down Garcia pulls this string that seems to raise the Sail of this Magnificent Ship that instantly rights its course… Weir sings to the ceiling and it seems as though his eyes are constantly in the shadows of his brows… Anybody that ever thought Bob was looking at them while he was singing must have had seats that hung from the rafters… He wasn’t looking at you… Ever… As the Watchtower winds down the first notes of China Doll can be heard hidden somewhere underneath the closing notes of The Watchtower… It all seems incredibly perfect… The story of this Doll begins to unfold with so much meaning… For the first time I realize exactly what the Hurdy Gurdy signals and completely understand my need to abide it… The music is haunting yet absolutely beautiful… As Jerry sings “Stranger Ones have come by here” you look around and spot each one of them… You intuitively seem to know what’s going on with people around you… That guy is nervous… Those aren’t his seats… He’s hoping nobody comes back for them… That girl is thinking about her sister… That dude is trying like hell to control his high but Puddles don’t come with steering wheels… He can’t abide it… Everyone’s Soul becomes transparent as the Music completely lifts the veil on every insecurity and ego in the room… It’s Fuckin Wild… My nipples are so hard you could hang a shotgun across them… The entire band is perfectly orchestrated with Candace in command of the lighting accompaniment as the sweet harmonies blend together with Brent’s voice sounding like broken glass in a velvet bag and piercing through the darkness as we all can’t help but to think in our minds (Holy Shit there is so much beauty in this darkness and I totally GET IT!!!) and then the moment comes…. “Take up your China Doll…. Take up your China Doll……… It’s Only fractured….. Juuuuuuuuuuuust a little Nervous from the fall………. Laaaaaaaaaa La Laaa La La La La Laaaaaaaaaa!!!” You realize in that moment that you’re not totally broken… Only fractured… You couldn’t stop the tears if you tried… Just a little nervous… It’s gonna be alright…

Another moment of complete surrender to the process of Character Development brought to you exclusively by The Grateful Dead….

Dead To The Core,

Dean Sottile (pronounced So Tilly)

A Touch of Grey… Poupon

For those that missed it, The Official Home of Unofficial Grateful Dead News attracted the attention of a writer at the New York Times and I ended up with my picture and one lousy quote in an article on the 50th Anniversary Shows in Chicago. You can find that article here: Grateful Dead Fans Replace VW Vans With Jets and the Ritz-Carlton

I’m writing this piece aboard my yacht and eating shit that rich people eat, all while my staff of underpaid and overworked peasant servants are busy manicuring the expansive gardens on my compound and braiding the manes of my imported unicorns. I like the picture but I do have one regret. I wish I was wearing an ascot. I typically step into my 10,000 thread count Egyptian pajamas when I get home and put on my ascot to remind me of the vast wealth and opulence that surrounds me and keep any possible draft from causing a chill on my neck. That would be much more fitting for a guy like me. Ahhhh yes, the good life…

There’s one thing that was clearly left out of the New York Times article. The great equalizer of all people, great and small. The one thing that showed everyone within an hour or so how level the playing field of real life really is. What was missing was a huge punch bowl of Owsley’s Kool-Aid. For those of us that swam in the deep end of Owsley’s pool, the realization of seeing the world exactly how it is through the psychedelic microscope of unlimited perception is part of what changed us forever. I remember watching people that had great power and influence within their materially driven worlds come unglued, like a child’s art project subjected to the forces of nature. They would then be comforted and kept from going completely insane by a guy that lives in a van. Those who were high minded in their own sight were driven to tears at many an Acid Test as the illusion they maintained for most of their lives came into contact with the Great Magician. When the curtain was removed from the pillar of inflated senses of self, what was left was typically a deflated and scared child crying like they just got the news that Santa Claus died. One of the special things about this community was that there was always some folks, that the individual previously deemed far inferior to them, ready and willing to help them through their complete and total meltdown. We found through those experiences how level the playing field was for every single one of us. Preconceived ideas of the importance of people, places and things gave way to the realization that we’re all truly one. While some may have been more entertaining than others we realized the significance of the gifts that were inherent in everyone and how they were all equally important in the game of life. We saw through all the bullshit and Paper Tigers as all things appeared exactly as they were without any of the false filters that were installed in us by the media machine year after year since our births. You never knew which side of your psyche would be up for examination but with time and some repetition, all aspects of our lives and thoughts would have to endure the scrutiny of the Acid Test. Those of us that stuck around long enough eventually got our degrees. I’ve kept all of those valuable lessons near and dear to my heart and my daily affairs.

When Kate contacted me to participate in the interview for a piece the New York Times was doing, after she came across my blog, I was happy to participate. She is a really sweet woman that was given an assignment to create a piece about an issue that, in my opinion, wasn’t much of an issue. The incredibly high prices of making it to the Dead’s Fare Thee Well shows in Chicago and the all the wealthy people that were going for the party. During our interview, she wanted my commentary on how expensive tickets were and I was pretty clear that while tickets listed on StubHub for tens of thousands of dollars, nobody was buying in at that price. I told her I could list my daughter’s bike on Craigslist for $25,000 if I wanted to but nobody would buy it. I explained that as we get closer to the shows those prices will have to drop dramatically or nobody is buying them. The story wanted to focus on something other than what the scene has always been about. It’s always been about all kinds of people coming together under the umbrella of Grateful Dead Music and joining as one. Since the beginning, Dosed Doctors have shared dancing space with Drunk Derelicts… Christians danced beside Criminals… Powerful people joined hands with paupers… The truth was always that WE are everywhere. From the top to the bottom and everywhere in between. Once we entered the lot, any barrier that seemed to separate us previously vanished instantly before our eyes. That’s the Grateful Dead Community that I’ve always been a part of over the years.

Certainly, I’ve pulled no punches on my blog about how a portion of the vocal fan base think they should have everything for nothing and that they’re somehow entitled to be there because they’re more deserving than someone else. Perhaps those folks need to be reacquainted with the Great Equalizer or at the very least, remember the things we took from those experiences. Nobody deserves anything any more than anyone else. There will be just as many people that will make Chicago happen on a hope and a prayer as there are people that will be doing it any other way. Life has always been about being a contributor to me. Making a difference in the lives of others utilizing the gifts you’ve been given. Whether that’s making people laugh a little more often or being able to cook them something worth eating. Rewards in life can often be measured by how you utilize those gifts. I’m grateful that my life has been full of experiences that continue to confirm all of those things I learned in the deep end of Owsley’s pool. I’m grateful that I never see myself above or below any other individual. I’m grateful that I’ve always seen everyone in the game of life as equals and have treated them that way whether they’re my server at a restaurant or the President of a large corporation or College or a member of my favorite band. Some Rise, Some Fall, Some Climb…

Following the Dear Jerry show last Thursday, I jumped in my car and drove home, 4 hours, from Merriweather Post. I drove home immediately after because Friday morning was Daddy Day at my daughter’s school. I had time for 3 hours of sleep before getting up and ready for the dreaded day. I felt like I got run over by a herd of Rhinos wearing cleats. When I arrived at my daughter’s school, she became the happiest little thing I’ve ever seen. We ran around together for her recess and I ended up staying longer than expected to have lunch and ice cream with her. My head felt like a rotten cantaloupe… My daughter reached her little arms around my neck and hugged me as hard as she could. She said, “This is the best day ever, I Love you daddy!” My heart melted and my head cleared as the deepest sense of gratitude settled deep within me. That’s what makes me a rich man, not where my seats or hotel is located in Chicago.

California Kevin wrote to me on my Facebook Page yesterday with a beautiful picture of himself, his wife and his 2 daughters. He told his story. He mentioned he couldn’t write or type that good but continued to honestly share the path his life has taken over the years. He said that 25 years ago he didn’t have a house to live in, just a woman he loved and was beginning to create memories with. He was grateful for everything that he learned through the process but he had things in life that were more important to him than the Dead nowadays. First and foremost, being a present and loving father watching his 2 beautiful daughters grow up. He won’t be taking a Private Jet to Chicago and he didn’t score a package from CID but California Kevin is an extremely rich man. Regardless of where he’s staying or how he’s getting there… Love y’all!!! See ya soon!

Dead To The Core,

Dean Sottile (pronounced So Tilly)

Putting My Words Into Action and Jerryweather Review

Yesterday started off just like any another day that’s ever been… I headed out in the morning without realizing where the day would take me. Then I got hit by the same Bus that hit me so many times in the past. I looked online and saw all of the posts from the folks heading to Dear Jerry. Something started churning… With little to no warning I cancelled every responsibility for the day, put a sign on the door that said, “Gone Fishing”, jumped in my car and hit 95 South like an old school fugitive. After living an extremely responsible life for the passed 20 years, it felt as exhilarating as I remembered it being in The Summer of ’89. The logical part of me tried like hell to implant all kinds of thoughts in my mind to remove the adrenaline from my body and replace it with every doubt and fear imaginable. The little voice that says, “It’s Sold Out”, “What if you drive 4 hours and don’t get a ticket?”, “It’s not too late to just turn around and continue with the day that’s just like any other day… Ever been…”

Then the side of my brain that holds the memories of times gone by, the one that was created in large part by my years on the road with The Dead completely and totally kicked in. I just wrote a piece 2 days ago about just showing up where the magic is happening and KNOWING some of it is DEFINITELY going to happen to YOU! The human brain contains 10 times more emotional centers than Logic based centers. That’s a big part of the reason why over the years we’ve abandoned all logical choices regarding life to follow The Dead. My emotional neurology is Dead to the Core! Most likely, yours is too. The Grateful Dead are embedded into my emotional neurology so much that I’m certain my grey matter is actually half red, half blue, 13 point bolt dividing them. I took my own advice and began envisioning myself in some of the best seats in the house. I looked on TicketFly and saw that a bunch of seats in the back of the pavilion were being released. I thought about buying one but my expectations and my vision was for something MUCH better.

I arrived at Merriweather Post 4 hours later and began strolling through the lot. To honor Garcia I wore a black pocket T which caused people to think I was a cop. Get a haircut and wear a plain black T Shirt and people start hiding shit when you walk by. After about an hour, I scored a VIP Package in the lot for about 1/3rd of what it sold for originally. I didn’t know it at the time but it turned out to be one of the best seats in the entire venue, the first row of the elevated section about 10 rows from the stage.

On with the show!!! Since the night was packed with so many artists, I’m just going to point out the highlights of the night for me personally. At 7:00 on the dot Phil came out with his band. Phil’s son is a great guitarist and growing more every month. I think he’s outstanding! That was the last anybody saw of Phil… Seems a bit egocentric if you ask me. Maybe he had something else to do. That’s all I’m gonna say…

Allen Toussaint absolutely KILLED it with a JGB rocker, Get Out Of My Life Woman. The crowd was absolutely supercharged for the massive evening ahead of us. Grisman did what Grisman does and was extremely Grisman! Peter Frampton, who seemed most like the crayon that might not belong in the box, hit it out of the park with Roadrunner building on the momentum of the show. Buddy Miller’s Deal was outstanding and you could get the feeling that this night was gonna be MUCH better than expected. Jorma’s Sugaree was exactly what you’d expect from Jorma. It was Jormaee…

At this point in the evening, I made an incredible observation. As the people in the crowd have gotten fatter over the years, their doobies have gotten equally skinnier. I saw my pal, J**p*r light up a doobie in the parking lot that looked like the toilet paper roll when it only has a single wrap of paper left on it but other than that, people’s Fatties have gotten awfully skinny. I don’t smoke myself, as a matter of fact, I kicked drugs and alcohol after having a habit similar to Garcia’s and have been totally drug and alcohol free 22 years as of TODAY!!! Happy to be alive… Yup, my anniversary! Back to the show…

The biggest ovation of the evening belonged to Jimmy Cliff! The crowd went wild for The Reggae Rocker and he absolutely backed it up with “The Harder They Come”. We were dancing our collective asses off and those moments started happening, when in the middle of your music induced frenzy, limbs joyfully flying through the air, you catch the smiles and flashing moments of eye contact with strangers around you that seem to fill the venue with the kind of Love that only sharing in the music can provide. Weir came out and along with Bill and Mickey joined Jimmy Cliff for a Fire On The Mountain that was raging!! Where was Phil? That’s all I’m gonna say… An OUTSTANDING first set that provided MUCH more than I went into the night expecting.

After an extremely brief intermission, Billy and the Kids took the stage. If you have a chance, GO AND SEE Billy and The Kids! They ripped through Help->Slip>Franklin’s with a the kind of enthusiasm that is rarely found among Dead Projects. Bill seems to have this abundance of new life as of late and played more of a role in the evening than anybody. Truly one of the best moments of the night!

I don’t listen to all of the bands that are considered “Jam Bands” out there so I don’t have much experience with the Disco Biscuits, nor do I have much experience with the Military, but I can tell ya this, the one brother came out dressed like a Para Trooper or some kinda shit. Those brothers absolutely blew the lid off of the place with a Scarlet->Rider that was, for me, the best performance of the night. The jams were as incredible as the absolute commitment displayed by them as they blasted through it with the kind of passion and intensity that has made me want to experience much more of what they’ve got. It was an IMMENSE moment and would’ve been a much more appropriate way to close the set than to be at the beginning of it!

Everybody was tremendous but the show from that point on slowed down considerably. The last hour of the night should have really been towards the beginning or the middle. Brent used to sing, “Never trust a woman that wears her pants too tight.” He wouldn’t have trusted Grace Potter for a second. She came out with some seal colored shrink wrap britches on her bottom half and if I was gonna say anything, it would only be, “Dat Ass!” She looked as delicious as ice cream in August. When she came came out, Weir kissed her right on the lips as if to say, “Who’s the man still, bitches?!?!” What a gorgeous and talented woman. You could tell she cherished the moment. Weir looks really good and healthy. He was as expressive and as animated as I’ve ever seen him. Like I said, I thought the acts that made up the end of the show were much better suited to be somewhere in the middle of it. The real juice of the show seemed to be all placed right in the middle of it.

Then for my favorite song of all time, Morning Dew, out comes Widespread Panic. I know they have a pretty big following. I’ve always loved Jimmy Herring and Dave Schools is a bad ass bass player that looks like he comes from the same gene pool as Shrek. The bass looks like a Ukulele on him. He can play the hell out of it though. Then as the song began, the worst sounding voice in the history of the world starting singing this beautiful masterpiece. How the hell do Panic fans listen to that for hours??? It was a cross between Julia Child and Hell, if Hell had a voice. I mean, he makes Dylan sound like Pavarotti. When I say he KILLED the Dew, I mean like a squirrel getting run over by a truck. I Love all my Spread Head friends out there, God Bless all y’all, but I hope I never have to hear that man sing ever again… The music was outstanding though…

Then for Weir, Billy and Mickey closing out the evening with Touch of Grey. Where was Phil? That’s all I’m gonna say about that… MSG Walk of Fame this week. Where was Phil? He’s got a place in NYC. That’s all I’m gonna say about that… The encore and Finale was one of the most enduring tunes in Grateful Dead History, Ripple. It was beautiful to see everybody out there together as we all sang Ripple, Except for Phil. Where was he? That’s all I’m gonna say about that… Clearly 3 of our favorite musicians are on the same page!

All being said, it was an evening that far exceeded my expectations. It moved along brilliantly and the performances were inspired and filled with all the joy the memory of Jerry Garcia provides. Even with number of tunes that were played, you can think of so many that were left out, reminding you not only of the genius that was Jerry but how vast his musical repertoire is. You know who really sounded a lot like Garcia? Who was able to stay just half a step behind everybody else and somehow still surpass everyone in the process? The one guy that created his own pocket to sing in and placed the lyric fractionally behind all expectation to keep the music from getting too far ahead of it while making it look absolutely effortless? Absolutely Nobody… What came natural as breathing to Garcia has never been replicated. No matter how many try they are always forced by the notes they’re playing to either jump ahead of the moment or, while trying too hard, get stuck behind it. It’s the magic that only one guy possessed and it was an incredibly special night to be a part of.

Remember my friends, put yourself in a position to have something magical happen for you and, often times, it certainly does…

Keep an eye out for my article on the New York Times article! That’s gonna be fun!

Gratefully Deadicated,

Dean Sottile (pronounced So Tilly)

#DearJerry

Back In Time to Alpine In 89

For those that can’t find satisfaction anywhere since Garcia passed, there was Meet Up at The Movies. Those of us that were at Alpine that year remember a few things. We Bid You Goodnight caused God himself to cry for the next 2 days straight. The torrential rains began immediately following the first We Bid You Goodnight since December 31, 1978. I’ll never forget the opening lyrics and the intense amount of chills that coursed through my entire body. It was on a Monday and the last time my body was completely dry until some time the following Thursday. If there was ever a Navy Seal Hell Week on Grateful Dead Tour, it was Alpine 89. The first hour or so that followed our exit from the Ampitheater was pure ecstasy. Then came the realization that not only were you as wet as you were high but that, high was wearing off and wet wasn’t.

As a 45 year old man, The Summer of 89 was My personal Summer of 69. My first Summer that I said, “Fuck It!” and left home with $40 and a backpack and hitched rides around the country seeing the Summer Tour in it’s entirety, all by myself. Well… Not really by myself, a bunch of you were out there too. It’s the Summer I really learned the depth and magnitude of the experience and had sufficient time to have the outer shells ripped off of me like an onion. The year I realized I was a stranger nowhere and could find commonalities and kindness anywhere. The year I realized that I can become everything and become nothing all within the same week. The Summer I realized I could have a mountain of riches one day, ordering $50 Steaks to my room at The Ritz Carlton and having conversations with the crew at the bar and spend the following night eating grilled cheese and sleeping in the woods sharing deep thoughts with the homeless. I experienced all sides of life that Summer and I’ll never be the same because of it. It changed everything about my perspective and viewpoint on our collective existence. It was the best Summer of my life…

On to reviewing the Meet Up at The Movies… The Summer of 89 found the band in the finest form they had experienced in a long time.  As the show kicked off with Hell In a Bucket, we all instantly remembered what made The Dead, The Dead. I was right back there except dry this time. I should have gotten fully dressed and took a cold shower before the Movie to really bring it all back home. When the first notes of Sugaree get fired off I always get this indescribable and soothing calm that comes over me. Hearing Garcia’s voice is like being dipped in a vat of Cool Aloe when you have a sunburn. I was reminded of so many of those nights inside of venues when in the midst of the brain melting mayhem, you looked toward the stage and just immediately noticed Garcia’s right arm and elbow that always seemed to stand out like an angel’s wing amongst the backdrop of dim lights and his all black attire. As he ran through the solos, it was as if The drummers kept this enormous machine spinning while Brent’s sweet Hammond heaped coal into the furnace that was processed by the machine and shot out out as pure heat that flew off of Garcia’s strings like sonic bullets covering us all in the radiant glow of progressive and continuing enlightenment. The whole thing being pushed steadily forward by the incomparably deep sounds of Phil’s bass that was always there to perfectly cover any open spaces we might fall through….

The Cowboy segment never disappoints and 89 was certainly a healthy and dominant year for Weir. Then the official first set Garcia favorite of all fans born to wander the world and play the game of life through the eyes of a rebellious and unattached drifter, Althea. Every single verse in that song is a Masterpiece. Each one better than the last… It cuts you as deep as it heals you. It attempts to correct you as much as it encourages you never to be corrected. One of my favorite favorite Jerry tunes ever and I think a lot of us feel that way.

I like Victim now better than I did then. That’s all I’m gonna say. That tune really became the official Anthem for The Freaked Out Early Exit. I saw a lot of spooked out hippies head for the doors early at many a show during that tune. West LA made me realize that not only was Garcia my favorite artist of all time but that he was also my favorite Gangster! All of a sudden those orthopedic shoes started looking a little more like some crisp white Gangsta kicks that may have been a gift from a friend named Rocco or Tony Montana. The whole thing just brimming with the sound that added so many characters and colors to everything the band played. I didn’t know if I should just keep smiling or just start crying….

When Desolation Row started I went to get a bite to eat… At home… I drove home, boiled water, cooked some ziti, ate it and got back in time for the last 3 verses. When the song began, I noticed Weir appeared to have a runny nose. He actually had time to completely heal from a mild cold during the song. Deal provided everything required for an intermission filled with excitement and anticipation of more of the same high energy we were all jiving on…  I must say, I appreciated the 30 second Intermission as opposed to what felt like a week and a half of waiting for the band to come back on the night it actually happened. While I’m saying that, Is it just me or are songs actually much shorter than I remembered them being? It always seemed like Space was the hardest 3 hours to get through… Now when I listen back, it wasn’t but a few minutes… It felt like forever back in the day…

Box was always a favorite and consistently a good sign of things to come when the second set opened with it. The Foolish Heart was outstanding and because it’s a Garcia tune, I always liked it from the first time I heard it. Looks like Rain was made instantly better because Terrapin followed it. As the the band made their way into drums, we get a camera full of Kreutzmann who looked like an Epileptic that just discovered bread sticks at a salad bar. Billy could go way out there and absolutely had the best faces of any member in the band when he was really in the pocket. His eyes were so far back in his head I’m surprised he didn’t get jumped by Paramedics. I always have loved watching him. Mickey is just plain sinister on drums playing with all kinds of cool stuff back there. Shit gets weird during drums and you’d look up and Mickey would be hitting a Goat’s skull with the jawbone bone of a donkey or some kinda shit like that. They consistently created a completely unique mood, vibe and environment every night through drums. What a treat!

Watching  Jerry and Brent interact is something else that brings tears to my eyes. If any one of us tried to stand between Garcia and Brent at any point, during any show, we’d melt faster than a chocolate Easter Bunny in the Caribbean sun. When those 2 were interacting with each other musically it provided more magical moments than David Copperfield’s old Vegas routine. I’m eternally grateful to have been present for so many of those moments.

The big reason I wouldn’t miss this years Meet Up at The Movies was because of The Dew. If my Soul was a song, It would be The Dew. Watching Garcia during that was a mixture of euphoria and sorrow. Euphoric that it happened, sad that it hasn’t in 20 years and never will again.  If I was only able to listen to one song for the rest of my life, it would be Garcia singing The Dew. That night was a fine example of why. For a man that rarely moved more than a few inches during the course of an evening, nobody in history could hold 20,000 people in the palm of their hand like Garcia could. During the quiet moments, we’d all wait to breathe until it was most appropriate. Garcia smiling for one second on the big screen still sends cheers throughout Theaters from Los Angeles to New York City. I’d like to personally Thank Manasha for the last great Garcia years from the late 80s to the very early 90s. She took great care of him and he was as vibrant and alive through that stretch as I ever was able to see him. Often times in life, the bucket that holds your gifts is the same size as the bucket that holds your curses. For someone like Garcia, Balance was a point he passed by very briefly on his way to the next extreme. A talent like the world will only experience once in history, not nearly as impressed by himself as the throngs of followers that surrounded him. A reluctant leader better acquainted with his own shortcomings than any outsider would ever consider him having. It was all part of what caused us to Love him even more. Even from a Theater, over 25 years later,  his star was shining as brightly as it ever has… He made all of us feel like he was singing directly to us. We all thought, at least a few times, he was looking right at us, he was just that engaging. He didn’t have to be flashy because his core emitted more Juice on a bad day than a costumed poser could possess on their best day. He had the attention of everybody and everybody hoped, if only for a moment, to have his… That was well worth the price of admission…

Dean Sottile (Pronounced SoTilly)
The Official Home Of Unofficial Grateful Dead News

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A Swift Addition For Donna Vocals

In news that shocked pop music fans of the world like finding out there was no Santa Claus or Easter Bunny, rumors leaked this week that Bob Weir would hit the road again this fall with John Mayer and bass player from the Phish, Mike Gordon. The Rhythm Devils were on board as well even though Billy thinks a lot of people, in general, are assholes. Since I will never use the term “Core + #” to explain anything that happens with the remaining players of my favorite band, from this point on I will refer to them as The members of the band not named Garcia. This will help with any confusion in the future. The “Core 4” belongs to the Yankess, Like it or Not!

Perhaps most surprising of all are the reports that Taylor Swift will be covering Donna parts and vocals. When Bob Weir was asked about these rumors he said, “I believe Taylor can intelligently interpret the vibe we’re laying down and give to it a little something fresh and new. She’s got this piece of something that really gives some perspective to the music that’s never been experienced before which I guess goes without saying being that she never experienced any of the music before.” John Mayer, hated by most Dead Fans because his records sell, had this to say, “It’s gonna be great experience for all of us and I know it won’t take more than a week or two before I get dat ass!”

Reports of the Fall tour went over like Brown Acid at Woodstock among the Grateful Dead Faithful. The announcement was met with the same kind of enthusiasm you might find with your invitation to Jury Duty. Many fans are outraged and insulted that the members of the band, that are not named Garcia, would have the audacity to play music with anyone other than the same guys that have been trying to pull off Garcia for decades. We all know by now the unbridled joy that circulates when anyone from Phish is included. This time, Dead Heads get to be treated to the band’s bass player, nicknamed Cactus because his personality appears to be that of a prick. As a veteran of hundreds of Phish shows dating back to 1991, I can assure you, he’s a creative genius that is quite prickish on the surface. I don’t know him, so he very well could be a veritable geyser of sunshine and happiness but you’d never guess that by looking at his face. Dead Heads have long felt it necessary to hate Phish for some reason and have often complained about Phish fans attempting to shove Phish down their throats. It appears like the guys left of the Dead, not named Garcia, are helping with that all they can.

It’s rumored that the first appearance of this group will take place at The Prankster’s Acoustic Acid Test, 4th of July weekend. Rumors that The Pranksters have rented out all of Northerly Island for nearly a week are widespread. The Band of Jokers were in Chicago securing legal permission to host their festivities which shows that these people are smarter than your average bears. I never knew those Clowns had that kinda money to be honest with you. Seems like they possess way more power and resources than anyone may have imagined. Apparently, Prankstering is Big Business. I’ve been doing all this shit for free… What the hell am I thinking???

I look forward to a young guy like John Mayer taking on a project with our favorite musicians almost as much as I look forward to hearing what a well studied Trey will be bringing to the experience. I know my opinion may not fall in the majority of those that make up our scene but give a musician like John Mayer or Trey some time to study the master and I think the end result will be great music. The problem is, what we experienced was the Soul of Garcia. No amount of study or natural talent can give a guy that.

Brings me back to one of those moments… Black Peter, Vegas ’91… In the midst of this solemnly tempoed tune, Bill and Mickey’s cymbals sound almost as though they’re being dragged along the ground while walking across the dry and somber landscape the tune paints a picture of… Garcia seems to stroll through a low lying garden of sound searching for the note that best represents the collective soul of the entire experience like someone might search for a 4 leafed clover… As he riffs through a multitude of choices he finds the one that speaks most clearly to him and, as a result, all of us as well… He picks the note from the garden as he sees fit and pulls the string with all he’s got unleashing this enormous wave of emotion infused in a Psychedelic Blues that seems to wrap around the entire venue, instantly pulling from every direction all attention, emotion and everything significant at that moment in time back into himself… As Garcia’s notes get higher, Phil’s get increasingly lower seemingly acting as cushions that carry Garcia’s notes into the stratosphere by way of our hearts. All attention, regardless of how scattered, instantly returns to the stage where Garcia is firmly planted like a Mighty Oak. As his glasses slide lower down his nose his eyebrows rise higher up his face as the sound of all of us getting hit with something so heavy, all at the same time, creates this spiraling tornado of applause and acknowledgement that pops the lid off of our collective consciousness as our eyes lock with strangers off in the distance having the exact same experience and uniting us instantly with strangers in the distance… As we swelter in the desert heat having our minds stretched like hot gum pulled from the pavement, Garcia stands there cooler than a Snowman screwing an Ice Princess… It’s hard to describe the way those moments removed the thorns from our own thoughts and lives but they absolutely did…

Yup, That shit isn’t happening again regardless of who’s playing guitar. Those are the moments that the most skilled of mimickers can’t recreate on their best days. It’s the reason why the music will never really go Further because Further would typically imply deeper, better, more meaningful. The music can continue and move on and be respected and honored but I’m not sure it can ever really go “Further” if indeed that’s what Further would imply.

In hilarious news, it was reported that Pay Per View options would be available for the Fare Thee Well Shows, more or less insuring theaters would be as empty as the Bottle Garcia sings about in Ship Of Fools. Even funnier was a Pre Sale for Pay Per View Broadcasts. That’s about as necessary as more Grateful Dead cover bands in Chicago 4th of July Weekend. Either way, everybody is going to get all The Dead they can possibly handle. That’s probably a good thing…

Check out the World’s biggest Fan Appreciation movement currently underway at #NFA on Facebook!

Gratefully Deadicated,

Dean So Tilly

Fantastic Mail Order, Theaters And Acidless Tests!!!

In a refreshing change of pace, The Internet Mail Order went off without a hitch. The only people bitching were those that are excellent artists and figured their talents usually took them to the front of the line. According to the Blogger guy that wrote the “Not Your Grateful Dead” article somewhere, a guy basically competing for the prize of World’s Biggest Whiner and Pain In The Ass, Peter Shapiro called him to see how they could work together to make Santa Clara better. It seems more like Peter asked Trey for some help as the same people that have been doing Internet Lotteries for Phish took care of the Ticketing. The process was so easy that many people were completely confused once finished. It couldn’t be that easy could it??? No Index Cards, No 17 Postal money orders, hopefully all in the correct amount to fill out, No trying to be Stanley Mouse on the envelope, No trying to fit an envelope inside of an envelope after doing all that? Within a day after the deadline, everybody knew whether they got tickets and if so exactly where their seats were located. Not to mention, using a Credit Card, some people will be able to pay this off by some time in 2025. I hate to say it, but y’all can probably thank Phish for that. If this was done for Chicago, it probably would’ve led to Elvis at GDTSTOO living a few extra years. This process has probably aged the kind soul ike the cheese that rich folks eat. From what I could imagine, Elvis probably needs about a month of sleep… Some of you will get your money back in time for Christmas shopping, for others, there’s always All Saints Day.

Here’s a blogger that can help you out a little bit if you want some advice. My 6 tickets for Santa Clara came along with a $200 “Service Charge”. In the future, can you do me a favor? Just include that shit in the ticket instead of giving everybody another item to complain about. In the past Service Charges were something you incurred at a Bachelor Party or curbside in Manhattan. At least you were well aware of the service that was being provided. Except, in those scenarios, I was doing the screwing, not receiving it. Doing the math on Levi’s, there’s about $5.5 Million Dollars in Service Charges. I’m all about abundance so I’m not gonna hate on anybody too much but, that’s a lot of fuckin. I guess with the bounteous good will and appreciation behind the event and all, we’ll just call it Making Love…

In a questionable move announced this week by the folks at jambands.com and every other .com that wants a piece of the traffic that talking about World’s Greatest Band of all time provides, The Fare Thee Well Shows, in Association with Peter Shapiro and a few other companies that basically mean Peter Shapiro as well, the broadcast for the shows will take place in Theaters. I personally think this idea stinks worse than an LSD fart in a humid tent. Heady Dreadies and others that enjoy roasting new hybrids of Marijuana as often as kids roast marshmallows by campfires were outraged by the decision. Instead of streaming the shows from the comfort and safety of their own homes, Dead Heads will now be forced to play cops and robbers with security guards in cinemas like back in the old days. Instead of kicking back on a Summer Night and drinking a few Sammy Smith’s Oatmeal Stouts while tuned in from your living room, Have a Coke and a Smile bitches!

How about people with kids or folks that don’t live in the USA? A decision like this one obviously didn’t involve a discussion with the blogger guy that has all the answers. I’m baffled by this one… This was a no brainer or so I thought. Bands have been streaming couch tour for years. It’s one of the few things that kept me from selling my children when they were really little. When I first had kids and wasn’t able to attend shows like I used to, I invested in a Supreme Audio Visual Environment for my living room. Why? Because EVERYBODY that is somebody has an online stream. What the hell were y’all thinking? Now a bunch of Dead Heads have to sneak all kinds of contraband into a theater where they’ll be for 5 hours, 3 nights in a row. They’ll  get lit up like a Grow Room then have to drive home. Why did this really simple item get so messed up? Thank goodness for those new fangled vaporizer devices. Nowadays, Chewbacca look alikes can huff up like George Jetson and go practically unnoticed. Back in my day we had a thing called a bullet and a gym shirt with a bunch of brown spots on it from where we exhaled cannabis flower exhaust to contain the aroma.

It might be a good time to apologize to mom and dad about why the water in all of their sinks came out all messed up. That was me, I took all of the screens out, Sorry about all those calls you made to the plumber. As somebody that doesn’t drink or do drugs, it’s no big deal to me, I’m just sticking up for my stoner friends on this one. Epic Fail forcing people to leave their homes to participate. The sound and video will be incredible, there’s your consolation prize, Enjoy the Milk Duds! I would imagine more options may become available, I’ll be in Soldier Field…

THE INFORMATION BELOW IS NO LONGER VALID Due TO THE PRANKSTERS PULLING OUT OF THE EVENT AND QUESTIONABLE BUSINESS PRACTICES ARE BEING INVESTIGATED. YOU CAN READ IT FOR LAUGHS BUT THAT’S ABOUT ALL… I will DEFINITELY NOT be there or participate in any way. SEVERAL ARTISTS THAT THE PROMOTER LISTED AS CONFIRMED HAVE SAID ON THEIR PERSONAL FB PAGES THAT THEY WILL NOT BE THERE.

Rapidly becoming the biggest event in Chicago’s history, The infamous Bus of Never ending Adventure, Furthur, is preparing to roll into Chicago and will be leading the way to providing an entire weekend of endless entertainment. Yes indeed, if you’re not already aware, 4 Humble Heroes are leading the way from Oregon and are bringing The Merry Prankster Flavorlution to Chi town in what’s shaping up to be the biggest event of the weekend by far. The Merry Prankster roots go way deep into the Grateful Dead Culture so the names that are being mentioned around their weekend event are absolutely mind boggling. Being a close friend with Zane Kesey and all of the Official Pranksters(Blatant Lie) and talking to them all as much as I do(2nd time in one sentence now) this whole weekend deal will be like what might happen if Disney World ate a bunch of Sugar Cubes. The list of people that will be passing through and performing will make this event a veritable Who’s Who in the world of That’s Who. The organizers of the event have been adamant about letting people know that it’s not 1965 and most of us are too damn old to be filling our bodies with a bunch of narcotics. There will be absolutely no LSD at this event(I’m talking to you, Officers). There will be acres upon acres of absolute mayhem and adventure with the most fun group of folks that can be rounded up and they’re putting on a party that is absolutely second to none. You can catch more info as it develops on their Facebook Group that’s here. The folks over there are working overtime to make this the best and most reasonably priced event of the entire weekend. I’m not sure whether or not they’ll have “Service Fees”. Hopefully they read this and just include that shit in the price of the ticket

Bob, the community mourns with you on the graduation day of your father. His contributions to this world made a difference much bigger than he probably ever imagined. It’s with my sincerest and heartfelt sympathy, I extend my love and condolences to you and yours…

Grateful Dean on Facebook

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An Old Familiar Bulge In Levi’s

A wave of ecstacy has crested over the inhabitants of Grateful Dead Land for the second time in 4 months as the band officially announced 2 shows in Santa Clara, California the weekend before Chicago. Sure, it was announced unofficially by Bill Walton, The Sporting News, Jambands.com, Relix, Festivalhappenings.com, The Victoria’s Secret catalog, pamphlets at Tourist Welcome Centers, every fan that pretends to have connections, every fan that doesn’t and the least connected of all sources, The Official Home of Unofficial Grateful Dead News. While I’d prefer another video by Trixie, the silver haired Fox that sits on the throne of sexiest Dead Family Member, in my eyes, I’m glad they handed the official duty over to David Gans. He’s a brother that deserved the job. I hope I never meet Trixie… I’m sure my words would probably come out similar to those times in my early days of touring when I thought it might be a good idea to call home during intermission to ease my parent’s concerns since I hadn’t been home or called in a month. I’d have a case of boiling brain and run to a pay phone. When my mom answered I’d attempt to talk and something like, “She wanna buy a tender cannon shallow Garcia bacon mule” would come out. I’d hang up immediately due to scaring myself. I’d imagine I could possibly be exactly that composed meeting Trixie. Love ya Trixie! You’re way hotter than Bob! I digressed…

It’s clear that there’s a lot of people that can keep a secret like Sammy “The Bull” Gravano in “The Family”. This story had more leaks than the Titanic. When Bob Weir was asked about the additional shows he stated, “Even a blind man knows when the sun is shining!” Then he rushed the mic, threw a chord into the air, flipped his head back, went way falsetto and said, “HAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! I can feel it too!” The unprecedented demand for more Dead far exceeded the expectations of nearly everybody in the Dead Camp as well as the entire music world. While most of us have never stopped talking about the Dead since the 70s and 80s, people that have paid no attention to them ever are completely on board. Money is coming in quicker than it has since “Touch Of Grey” reached number 9 on the Billboard charts in 87. This time around the guys are more prepared than ever to capitalize on their last run of this magnitude. With Bob and Phil both owning watering holes and Meccas for live music in relatively close proximity to Levi’s Stadium, they’re taking home The Pregame Gold, The Main Event Gold and The Post game Gold. It’s pretty clear that the Illuminati could learn a few things from the Dead. Have The Dead been the leaders of the Illuminati all along??? SHATNER MOMENT (Incredibly overdone emotional outburst complete with frantic body language (Thanks Allison)!!!!!! I digressed…

When it was only one weekend in Chicago it seemed like we could all just enjoy a historic moment, on a holiday weekend, with people we love and The band that gave us most of the tools we have for living a life of kindness and absolute fuckery. With addition of more shows, thousands of people are now considering leaving their spouses, their homes, their jobs and every other thing they’ve accumulated during the past 20 years to chase the irreplaceable days of our youth. Even though the shows have been scheduled on weekends, one can’t help but fight the urge to act like a 20 year old whose parents think they’re at college. Many people have already collected over 60 tickets for events that precede and follow the Main Event for every show they’ll be attending. They’ve all done so forgetting they’re not 20 anymore and they’ll be ready for bed by the time The Dead finishes the first set.

One of the more profitable ideas, in my opinion, would be napping stations. I don’t know about you, but I’m gonna require a few naps if I’m gonna be full throttle when I wanna be. I’d pay good money to check into a napping station. By the time Space comes around, the Stadiums will resemble nursing homes more than concerts. People with absolutely flaming sunburns will have completely crashed in the most awkward positions, head way back, mouth wide open, neck all jacked up. Maybe people will get enough sleep during Intermission and Space to have ample energy to leave the building. You’ll remember reading this when you see the snoozers.

With a capacity of up to 70,000, I’m sure Levi’s will be a suitable venue for these shows. The madness and mayhem starts now! Have fun y’all!!!

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Prankster’s Acoustic Acid Test Secures Performances By Neil And The Inevitable Announcement

As reported a few days ago, The Merry Prankster’s Acoustic Acid Test will be recreating Yasgur’s Farm nearly a half century later with a lineup that will undoubtedly leave people wondering why they’d want to leave the undisclosed location for any reason at all. Reaching deep into the rolodex The Pranksters are pulling out more gems than David Lemieux. Surprisingly enough, I’ve found a touch of favor with an Official Prankster or 2 and some information on the upcoming Jamboree will be released through The Official Home of Unofficial Grateful Dead News. The biggest news to hit the Oregon based Headquarters as of today is Neil being added to the list of people that will be performing at The Acoustic Acid Test. Who could forget his hits, “Breaking Up Is Hard to Do” or “Love Will Keep Us Together”? Yes indeed, once reserved only at Shuffleboard conventions and occasional runs in Vegas, Neil Sedaka will be taking the Main Stage on July 4th! “Securing Neil to perform on our Main Stage was no easy task” said Derek, one of the leaders of Chicago’s 2nd Biggest event of the weekend. Apparently Neil’s Rider, a part of the contract that addresses the artist’s needs, is fairly extensive. There were a number of things that Neil required in his dressing room. Derek told us, “I guess the first thing we’re gonna have to do is find a dressing room… I figured we’d just have a chair… Mr. Sedaka frowned upon that suggestion.” Neil has requested 2 tanks of Oxygen which Derek was happy to acquire from a local Dentist (wink wink). Negotiations with Justin Bieber’s “People” to have him sit on the bench of a dunking tank filled with piranhas is moving along with little progress.

Early information has caused me to believe that the event will be held on property owned by Indians. I know what you’re thinking, “Tech Support and Internet Connectivity will be Awesome!!!” No my friends, when I say Indians I’m talking Tee Pees, not Tech Support… When I called organizers in an effort to get more accurate information as to the location of this camp, I was told by the group’s leaders, “It’s about a mile and a half south of None of Your Fuckin Business.” According to unofficial reports, a gaming permit has been applied for by an individual named “Haywood Jablowmee” from Oregon. Suspicious to say the least. Fans will be able able to bet on a number of things throughout the course of the weekend and all proceeds will benefit some kind of Foundation that does good shit. So far the odds of leaving the weekend with crab lice are 3 to 2. Odds of being asked for spare change by someone that spent $700 on their tickets are 6 to 4. There’s no odds on doing something you might regret on Monday because chances are too close to 100%. There will be a multitude of other fun things to wager on so stay tuned! You can stay up to date with all the breaking news on the 50th Anniversary Acoustic Acid Test at their Facebook Group

With Official Announcements of Santa Clara coming in a mere heartbeat, the community should be bracing for impact as a fresh wave of complete joyful exuberation followed by weeks of whiny bullshit will be taking off quicker than Neil Sedaka once his set is over. The Official Announcement is a secret that’s been kept from the public about as good as Clay Aiken’s sexuality. It’s clear that the announcements coming at us from Grateful Dead Land are sure to reclaim complete and total internet and media dominance. This space is getting hot…

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Gangster’s Paradise to Prankster’s Paradise

In tremendous news this week, it was announced that Zane Kesey will be leading the charge in turning Chicago from a Gangster’s Paradise to a Prankster’s Paradise 4th of July weekend. The announcement gave birth to a Bouncing Baby Joy as people started canceling hotel reservations quicker than they made them. According to early reports there is tons of camping and more special guests than 20 years worth of Rex Benefits. Special guests won’t be hard to come by since everybody that plays an instrument has booked a gig in Chicago already. John K’s name was finally mentioned bringing rainbow colored happiness to his immediate family as well as himself. Some fans have had more splinters in their asses than kids with no athletic talent and fathers that insist they’re on baseball teams since John K’s name has been mostly absent up until now. You’d think he’s Donna or something. I’m gambling on both of them participating in the historic weekend.

The name “50th Anniversary Acid Test” caused Chicago law enforcement to order 40 Clown Noses and begin training officers to ride unicycles and learn how to juggle immediately. The group of Merry Pranksters have made it clear that rumors of Hologram Owsley passing out Kool-aid are false. They have claimed the only acid that will be readily available during their event will be Uric Acid, the chief culprit in the onset of Gout. Posts have been made by the leaders of the movement that even snacks high in purines, typically leading to increased levels of Uric Acid and ultimately the onset of Gout will be extremely limited.

The announcement made by the Pranksters has sent a Spirit of Happiness through a community that has desperately needed some. The community that centered around not taking it all so seriously, in recent months has more closely resembled our government than the community we all were crafted from. The addition of a large scale Prankster Event is exactly what this weekend needed. With the connections that exist within this group of highly intelligent people posing as clowns, the guests that pass through this event are sure to be top shelf L, S and D Level Celebrities.

Tickets, prices and availability haven’t been announced yet which should give many of you plenty of time to think of how you’ll complain about tickets,  prices and availability. It was mentioned that the location is within jogging distance to Soldier Field as long as you can jog like Forest Gump. When I asked for details about performers and events for the weekend, I was hit in the face by a Cream Pie and then buried in that string shit that gets sprayed out of cans. Rest assured, The Pranksters know how to throw a party and have a strong female membership which typically assures that a bunch of stuff won’t be forgotten, like water and toilets.

Early rumors include performances by a Dark Star Orchestra Cover Band and a yodeling competition sponsored by a generic Hot Chocolate Company. A Prankster Olympics competition is a strong possibility with events like the Hamstring Pull and Synchronized Tent Screwing. What’s on the menu you ask? BBQ Ribs and mashed potatoes with Wavy Gravy. Speaking of Wavy, when asked if he would be camped out there for the weekend he replied, “You can find my ass camping at the Four Seasons you absolute nobody!” There’s no doubt that vehicles leaving the event on Monday will all smell like a mix between a gymnasium and a shallow grave.

We look forward to more details emerging as the days go by and I personally wonder if it’s all a joke in the first place. We all know Official Pranksters have one day a year off and that’s April 1st. Maybe the whole thing is a Prank that was mentioned on the first day back to work. I think it’s about time the leaders of those whose job it’s been throughout the years to spread laughter have emerged. I don’t know what the requirements ever were or are to be an Official Prankster but I’m glad the Official Army of Smiles have announced their participation in this historic weekend in what seems like an enormous fashion. As an Officially Unofficial participant of the weekend, it makes me happier than a briefcase full of acrobats!

Just a side note, LSD was supposed to show you everything you were required to see by now. The windows should all be open by now for most of us. The next step on the ladder was realizing you always had everything required to see what you needed to see without LSD but needed it for a while in order to reorganize your mind and demolish your ego long enough to allow that shift to happen. By removing the overbearing influence of the educated mind and handing over control to our innate consciousness we learned more about ourselves than books could’ve ever taught us. If the message didn’t come through by the time you were hearing Brokedown Palace, chances are you might have missed it. Anyway, what do I know? I’m just a guy with a website.

The Holy Days of April were celebrated in a fashion that perfectly represented the figures and events that were celebrated. Phil lead a Jewbilee at Terrapin Temple with the well to do while his brother, Bill Kreutzmann, posted a video of himself, in true Christ like fashion, taking a moment to play some makeshift drums with a street performer following brunch in San Francisco. I don’t know about anyone else, but watching that video really made me smile from deep inside. Check it out if you haven’t seen it on his Facebook Page.

Last but certainly not least, I Love You and there’s not a single thing you can do about it. Talk to ya soon!

Grateful Dean on Facebook
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